Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Lovely. Maybe even real.

Most often my dreams are crazy misfirings of the mind that get strung together into a narrative. But lately, I dream of her. I know she's passed away, but she's there. She's changed somehow. She's young, but she comes looking old, as though slipping on a familiar mask because she knows I'll recognize her better. That's not entirely it. I'd recognize her young. She comes old because she knows I miss her the way I last saw her.
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It is a poor mask. She is entirely new, entirely other. She has seen the face of God. I can see it, feel it.
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I used look forward to dreaming so that I could fly, breathe underwater, go down a waterfall in the jungle. Now I look forward to the night, wondering if I'll see her.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I could have sworn there was a different picture here earlier...both are nice memories.

El Gringo

kel said...

:) beautiful!

The Goodfellas said...

this is one of the last pictures ever taken of her.
<3

mark and monsita! said...

Me acuerdo perfectamente el dia que tomaste esa foto, a ella le encantaba que Loli caminara con su andador!! Me parece tenerla tan cerca de mi cuando veo su foto y tocarla!!! Gracias Jenny, te quiero mucho tambien.!!!!

missy said...

:)