Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Instantaneous Personal Magnetism

Matthew took up the hollowing of books a while back. He gave my dad one with a carved-out slot for his pearl-handled pistol to sit in; my daughter's will hold her earrings and hairbows. We started browsing the books at Goodwills and carried home a stack to slice up, only to find that we couldn’t cut into most of them. The covers were fantastic; the contents even better.

One that we found tells the reader how to gain influence through increasing his personal magnetism. It included a section on foods not to eat. Bacon, previously recommended by health experts for its carbon (according to the author), is best avoided. Wilted carrots, gravies of all sorts, boiled eggs, and fish. Men in three-piece suits with remarkably white teeth were scattered throughout the book, looking classy, confident, and composed.

Their poise reminded me of an article I read a few months ago about gaining influence through posture. Participants in a study were told to spit in a control cup; their saliva was studied for its levels of testosterone. They were then told to sit in power-diminishing poses for 15 minutes, shoulders slumped forward, knees together, chin down. They spat. Then they sat in postures that exuded bravado. They put their feet up on desks, put their hands behind their heads, and spat again. Across the board, people who acted like they were self-assured had raised levels of testosterone and, presumably, the ability to intimidate people.

I’ve been thinking about these essays on influence recently because I’ve become increasingly aware of the fact that I have none.

This is not to say that I will be eating Magnetism Dinners on a TV tray or that I’ll consult a chiropractor for the sake of the gospel. And does that sentence make sense at all? Did you know already what I was referring to?

I write post after post about Christ, about God, about the reality of the unseen, and the only ones who respond are the Christians. I’m not saying that my writing should persuade you to get on your hands and knees, but does it do nothing? Do you not wonder, at the very least, if it is true?

I think that it is because I am nothing to most people. And I don’t say that in mock-humility or out of low self-esteem. I say this because we simply don’t place value on what another person believes.

My mom saw man land on the moon in Ecuador on a grainy black-and-white TV screen. She thought it was a hoax. Ridiculous! A man on the moon. I recognize that asking you (dear Reader) to believe that I have seen the darkness tremble at the sound of Jesus’s name, that I have felt the power of his forgiveness made possible because of the cross, is as illogical as asking a TV viewer to believe that Neil Armstrong wasn’t walking on a Hollywood set.

And yet, you believe that the American flag flies in outer space.

You do. Because at some point, we all have to believe someone else. We choose when to listen and when to walk on.

Books used to be hollowed because Christians were hiding tiny copies of New Testaments inside them. They were willing to risk their lives for the chance to know this God more. They still do.

I met a woman who was tortured for her faith. She was beaten on the pads of her feet until they were raw like meat, and then made to walk in the dirt with heavy shackles around her ankles. She was told that all she had to do was sign a document recanting her faith. Communists in China, they give weight to belief. She walked in circles, reeling in pain, and finally decided to sign. As she was about to, she glanced down and saw her bloody footprints, now pooling up as mud. She said that she stopped for a moment, startled, realizing that this is what Christ’s footprints must have looked like as he walked towards Golgatha. She said, her voice choked, that she realized that he endured the same pain, only he didn’t have to.

You are so beautiful, Jesus. You are so beautiful, she said.

She wept. She could not deny him. She walked on.

You don't have to.



...
The blurb for Instantaneous Personal Magnetism reads: In light of today's understanding of biology and physiology, many of Shaftesbury's explanations of how to promote Personal Magnetism seem quaint and exaggerated. Regardless of the terminology, the methods work, and produce results. Little to nothing will come from just reading the book, it is the application of the outlined principles that manifests the ability.

I laughed at how easily the blurb could suit the Bible. In light of today's understanding of biology and physiology, many of these claims (ie. dying for sins and resurrection from the dead, omniscience, omnipresence, omnipotence) may seem quaint and exaggerated. Regardless, Jesus's methods work, and produce results. Little to nothing will come from just reading the book, it is the application of the outlined principles (faith and love) that manifests the ability (to someday see God.)

9 comments:

erin said...

you have such a knack for articulating the very things i've been rolling over in my own mind! i feel as if i should carry you around in my pocket, so i will have you ready to explain to me all of my frustrations and discomforts.

which may be an awkward way of saying i find you rather magnetizing. ;)

(regardless, finding myself often in the same predicament, i understand how you may feel that those who are still in need are not hearing what they so desperately need to hear. will keep praying.)

The Goodfellas said...

I was tossing around in my head this morning the reactions this might get (and cringing.)
Sometimes I set myself up for some pretty easy-to-give and hard-hitting slams. I feel often out of line. I suppose I probably am.

But this is the way I see it: I have a friend who's Muslim who thinks I'm going to Hell. Technically, I think I'll be questioned and tortured first beneath the ground for a while and then sent to eternal punishment? I can't remember.

I said to her one day "You think I'm going to Hell but you haven't once tried to convert me. I'm almost insulted." She laughed and said she'd come up with something.

What do I look like to you if I think you are lost but am not willing to risk my own standing to point you to God? Like I don't care, and that is not true.

I operate according to that, and somehow for some reason this is getting thousands of hits so I might as well say something.

If you know me, I hope that that gives my writing more credibility rather than less.

The Goodfellas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Goodfellas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Goodfellas said...

ps. e: They say that people should quit using cell phones because the radiation disrupts the bumble bees' abilities to operate according to the magnetic field of the earth. So if magnetism has to do with finding direction, maybe life is full of frequencies and it's just good to find another bee that's headed north? Or in my case, south. Because trust me, I'm not magnetizing. Especially not compared to the guys in the book. I wanted to be them, and I'm neither male nor 2D. ;)

erin said...

haha! what a shame!

... actually, no, not at all. i like you better this way. :)

rolli grove said...

i felt something straighten and heard it click -- <3

Anonymous said...

Akey stoy yo, dime cuando...mal escrito como codigo, solo para ti!

Kelly Holman said...

1) You have no idea what seeds you've sown.

2) In your weakness, He is strong. I've seen how His power doesn't work until I confess that I'm helpless.